Two Mantras for 28

Twenty-seven was a bad year for me. There's no way around it, it's quantifiable. Twenty-eight was also hard, but it was the year I started to make sense out of twenty-seven. It's been a slog, and I know I am not done yet. I wrote these two mantras, named after tarot cards I pulled over … Continue reading Two Mantras for 28

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A Death Drive Toward Life? Or, Fun Fact: All My Planets Are In the 6th and 8th Houses

I almost flunked grade four because I couldn’t finish Tuck Everlasting. The book terrified me. The main character Winnie (later played by Alexis Bledel—I heard, I couldn’t watch the movie) was given the choice to live forever, or continue to age, live a human life of growth, love and loss, and, yes, eventually die. Winnie … Continue reading A Death Drive Toward Life? Or, Fun Fact: All My Planets Are In the 6th and 8th Houses

Feminine Appetites (2017)

"A cultural fixation on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty but an obsession about female obedience." — Naomi Wolf in The Beauty Myth   "Let us break the tie with food and look at the metaphor: hungering… voracious… extravagantly and excessively needful… without restraint… always wanting… always wanting too much affection, reassurance, emotional and … Continue reading Feminine Appetites (2017)

How Many Generations Does It Take to Escape Abuse?

“A man could, feasibly, sacrifice his coffee break raping a woman. That woman would then spend her entire life dealing with it. So would her daughters. So would theirs. This distribution of power is not acceptable.” -- Inga Muscio, Cunt: A Declaration of Independence I think about my mother’s mother. First married at 18 to … Continue reading How Many Generations Does It Take to Escape Abuse?

Is Softness a Critical (per)Form(ance) of Femininity?

In Kathleen McHugh and Lisa Duggan’s 1996 Femme-inist Manifesto, they wrote: “Fem(me) science questions the dignity and wisdom of anyone who would wear pink without irony, or a floral print without murderous or seditious designs.” Of course, some of us unironically wear pink and/or floral — an arguably “soft” aesthetic. Does this mean we are … Continue reading Is Softness a Critical (per)Form(ance) of Femininity?